Times of today(09-10-2022)

Day before yesterday, its dhasara apparently. its a festival where we pay for our ancestors for there well-being, its a small puja. in past, every year we used to gather in our native village, to perform it. its a house 100 years old, says my father. Probably the oldest in the village.

This year puja wont be in that house, as its demolished and being constructed. past few year, couple of old houses are being reconstructed in village. i don’t see a concern with the old house, its was cozy and relatively huge. i remember proud and warm feeling in me at lunch, which was served by my grand mother. its a combination of waking up early morning. Going to fields to farm with my father its a delight to see how his face glow every time he step on a field, its remembers of his childhood i belive. the satisfaction i get from helping my father, hoping he would be proud of me. body aces from manual labour, sweating. by 11 most of the work used to complete. ending it with a warm shower, in a crude bathroom. all this boil down to a single light inside me, there is old something in the old house, from how presently cold ground feels like to how high the sealing is.

while the construstion of new house going we are staying in a rented house, 10 feet away. its feels same as the old house, tho its nothing like it.

I didn’t much involved in planning of new house, left it to my father. after 3 generation he is building new house, i am assuming its probably his dream.

My grand father from mother side, died last November. My mother is a only child to him, he worked as a government employ whole his life. died a year after retiring, my inherited a relatively solid sum from my grand father. Know my father, he was not eager to clear his debt. he cleared few and bought a land with all the inherited money on my mother name. it was his way of not wasting it and investing in a not risky channel, on my mother name. If you didn’t choose the tempting way of glorifying villages and its lifestyle. and know anything about how villages work and the social politics work. you would have anticipated the gossip the above situation will create. That my father is building that house with my grand father money. My father is more than capable of handling this, relative to any person i know. but he is still human, there would be at least some corner of his heart that he got hurt.

anyway, so everyone decided that this year. we are gonna celebrate the puja in Hyderabad house.

Morning on dashara, as i am on my way to salon to a buzz cut. which was a decision taken after a brief contemplation, considering how fond of how i look with bit long hair. but its mostly the decision take after a see a chick with a buzz cut, at my theater rehearsals the night before. how pleasant she looked.

On the way, received a video call from my mother.